Russell Smith the Magnificent

Russell is the perfect match for me in so many ways. We don't fight. I cannot remember a single time that we ever spoke in such a way as to hurt each other's feelings and if we ever unintentionally hurt each other, we always made it up so quickly it's as if it never even happened. We've had some pretty serious and intense conversations, it's true, but they have never caused ill feelings and we tried our best to see each other's point of view.

Russell breaking into my apartment for me when I forgot my key. Isn't he the greatest?

Because that's what Russell does. He tries to understand everything. If he cannot really see from a certain person's point of view, he tries to put himself in their shoes and see as they see. It doesn't always work, and he's the first to admit that he doesn't know everything and sometimes has a hard time seeing how other's brains work. But he thinks about everything. He carefully picks apart everything around him, everything he says, and everything he does.

One of my favorite words in the whole world is "potential." And Russell has a lot of it. He is incredibly talented and was well brought up. And he is always trying to improve himself. This is one of my favorite qualities in a person, as it is something I try to develop in myself.
He told me once that his greatest desire in the world is to know everything. This is something I've always really wanted, but never really acknowledged out loud. Like, I've told people that when I'm rich I'm going to have the biggest library ever and I'm going to spend all my time reading, but I don't usually tell them that I want a lot of technical, historical, and educational books. I, too, want to know everything there is to know. But I realize you can only know so much in this life and that we will learn everything after we die.

But that's beside the point. Back to Russell. He has a sense of humor similar to my family's. I'm pretty dang sure that if he were to meet them, everyone would get along swimmingly and that it would be the most natural thing in the world for him to be a part of my family. 

He's also a good mix of romantic and realistic, which is a good balance for me, since I tend to romanticize way too much. For example, after completely ruining one of my favorite chick flicks (Never Been Kissed) for me, I told him that he made me not believe in love anymore. And he told me that he believes in love, but that what they show in the chick flicks is not love. Which I knew deep down, but it's so much more fun pretending. So, he's usually logical like that. But then every once in a while, his inner poet appears and he tells me something so beautiful and romantic that it's like prince charming showed up on my porch with a bouquet of flowers. Also, one of my favorite things about Russell is how he gets so excited about the thought of getting married after having had a big engagement proposal. He wants his wedding to be big; he wants everyone in the world to know that he loves a girl and he managed to win her heart and now they will be each others and only each others forever. He's going to make it a big deal. And I love that.

He is one of the kindest people you will ever meet (even if he is sometimes a little disrespectful, like all men are). He genuinely cares about a lot of people and tries to make people comfortable around him by being generously inviting. He doesn't really change his personality according to who he is around, like some people. People like me. I am much more comfortable in some situations than in others. And I act differently according to who I am around, how many people are around, and what's going on. But I love the person that I am when I'm with Russell. I feel like he is the only person I can truly be myself around completely. I mean, I am myself around my family, but I sometimes don't like the person I am when I'm with my family. I feel like I can be annoying and stupid. I know I have a shorter fuse around them. But with Russell, I am so many of the things I want to be at all times. And Russell makes me want to be a better person.

So, how did I get to know the amazing person who is Russell Smith? It all started in Brother Hilton's New Testament class Spring of 2012. I had noticed Russell before, but I had never talked to him. He was definitely a man, but it was weird that so much man could fit into such a little body. It wasn't until I really got to know Russell that I realized that he was drowning in his clothes and his body isn't really oddly proportioned. So, for the first little while, I just thought he was a funny looking douchebag, with his baggy pants and his backwards hat.

One day, I was carrying my drawing board with me to class and he asked if he could see my drawings. So I showed him my sketch of the statues next to the MOA and asked if he could tell where it was. I was a little disheartened when he said no, but it was all made right when he explained that he'd never been there before, so he wouldn't have recognized it. He then introduced himself (mentioning Russell Crowe to help me remember his name) and that was pretty much the substance of our first conversation. After that, he often sat next to me in class. I don't remember many of our conversations, but I know we talked about him maybe joining the military and how his major is chemistry. There were also a few times he would walk me to work or to my next class, depending on the day. I had kind of expected to give me a hug eventually, but we never got past the fist bump.

I was the one who looked him up on the Learning Suite list to find his last name and then find him on Facebook. It didn't take me long to realize that he was more of a dork than a douchebag and I really wanted to get to know him because he looked so fun. But I was afraid that since I am the boring person I am, he wouldn't want to get to know me.

I was wrong. Our first lunch date was at Taco Bell. He ordered the Doritos box and I had a few soft tacos. My food was so messy and I was trying desperately not to make too much of a mess. Luckily he didn't notice that time too much, although he's made mention of my eating habits every time since. He finally asked for my phone number once after taking me to the HFAC and we looked around at all the displays. He told me that he didn't get art, but if I wanted to that he could take me around all the little things to do in the Eyring Science Center, his favorite building. I thought that would be a great idea, but we didn't end up doing that until we'd been dating for a while.

Around finals time, we had a study date. He had some cool tricks to help me remember things for the test, so I thought it was weird that I scored higher than he did. ;) I wasn't sure if it was really a date or not (he told me later that he wasn't sure either, because he was still deciding if he liked me or not) but I was a little confused when his roommate starting talking about how Russell owed him dinner and the first thing that popped into my head was that they must do that thing where you get your apartment candy or dinner after whatever (holding hands, kissing, going out, etc) happens. But that kind of melted away after we played some Mario Kart and Tony Hawk on the Nintendo 64. 

Then Spring term ended and he stopped going to school for the summer. A few weeks into the term, I went to start my car in the morning and it made the most horrific noises and I was so afraid for my life that the car was going to blow up. Luckily, a lovely soul saw my distress and he took me to school that morning. On the walk home after class, I texted pretty much every single boy in Provo in my phone to help me. Scott referred me to Craig who helped as much as he could over the phone, but Russell was the only one who offered to come and look at it. Of course, when he came and turned the ignition, the car worked fine. He joked that I didn't have to fake car problems if I wanted to see him. He suggested a car place and said he'd pick me up if I needed help. So later that week, I took my car to the place and spent the day with Russell. We had some Pita Pit, talked about some serious things, and then spent the rest of the day in his apartment where he played the piano and the ukelele and sang songs for me. He showed me the ones he or his friends had written and he taught me the basic chords on the uke. I was so amazed by him that day and the amazement never died down. I was so mesmerized that I accidentally missed one of my classes and didn't realize it until I was at work, and it threw off my schedule so much because I never miss class.

I didn't talk to him for a long time after that, because I was going out with Scott. But right after Scott and I broke up, I had a conversation with Will (my German speaking partner) in which he said that he worked cleaning carpets at the Tanner building, which is where Russell worked over the spring. So I texted Russell asking if he knew Will (he didn't, because by that time he'd gotten his ROTC secretary job) and things went off from there. We had a date that Friday, and I knew by the way we were flirting over text that he was going to kiss me that night. It made me unsure of whether or not I wanted to go, but I decided to just do it. We were going to go dancing, but (luckily for me since I can't dance) ended up watching a movie instead. After that night, we started spending ever spare moment we had with each other. I saw him every day the next week, but we'd had a few serious conversations, mostly about the church, in which we got to know each other in a way I don't think either of us knew other people. And that next Sunday, we mutually decided to break up, because we knew it wouldn't work out. I felt I needed someone I could marry in the temple and he needed someone who could accept him wholeheartedly without the gospel.

I cried the entire next day. It fogged up my contacts (or maybe salted them up?) and gave my cheeks a rash. And I'm sure it was an interesting sight for anyone in any of my classes if they looked over and saw me silently crying every now and then. And then I saw him in between classes and new that in two days I could "accidentally" run into him. And I did. We saw each other outside of class and it was awkward and I just wanted him to sweep me up into his arms and then he started texting me every day again and eventually asked if we could hang out. I had a t shirt I needed to return to him anyway, so I agreed to it. Sarah threw daggers at me with her eyes when she saw him coming to pick me up, since when I had come home crying the night we broke up it was the first time I'd ever let her see me cry and she thought it was a bad idea to go with him. We drove around and talked, got out for a little while and looked at the stars until we heard scary noises in the bushes and had to run away. And he was being all romantic and I couldn't help but like him. So we left things up in the air when I went inside for the night, and when he texted me asking what he should tell his roommates about us, I said I would be fine with us trying to date again.

We would still sometimes talk about spiritual things, but we never really had any more serious conversations about our future for a long time. Neither of us wanted to hurt and neither of us wanted to end it, so we just enjoyed each other's company. I spent every spare moment I could with him. We did the Provo Treasure Hunt together. We followed clues to the most random of places. I deciphered one of them at like two in the morning and promptly called him all excited and we woke up at like five the next morning and went out in the cold to walk the Provo River Trail. We had a lot of fun working out the clues and searching together, even though we never found the treasure.

We watched a lot of movies and spent a lot of time on the couches in his apartment. Most of that time we were supposed to be doing homework, but we'd end up talking or playing games instead. He completed a Nancy Drew game with me. We went to a haunted house on the weekend before Halloween, during which I screamed like a girl and squeezed his hand to death, which was uncharacteristic of me. On Halloween, he dressed up in a morph suit as an angry bird and I dressed as Dorothy. That night, I wore his sweats under my dress to work (since we are required to wear pants) and I didn't give them back for a long time.

We played some Xbox and some Wii and some WiiU. I get close to beating him in Just Dance and I absolutely cream him at Cooking Mama. We compete in Bike Race and Tetris and Bejeweled Blitz. I would sit and do homework or lie on the floor and sleep in the dungeon of the math building where he would spend hours programming after he switched his major to Computer Science. He made me cut his hair. I gave him a punk rock look, but he said he felt like a poser so he cut it all off. I like it a little bit longer.

We've eaten countless 5 dollar pizzas. He's cooked even more potatoes for me. He was always making sure I was fed. I only cooked him two meals that I can remember- chicken pillows (with fake mashed potatoes, which he hates, and green beans, when he doesn't eat vegetables, haha, so that was a bust) and asian food (sweet and sour chicken with cream cheese wantons and potstickers). We decided now that we are going to eat healthy and work out every day.

He asked me once what my goals were and how he could help me improve myself. He is also so supportive and once for a little while, he would remind me every day to read a couple of news stories, since that was one of the main areas I wanted to work on.

He did the most amazing things for the 12 Days of Christmas, starting things off with a dozen roses and setting up a treasure hunt with clues. A few things went awry, but it was fun while it lasted. You could tell he put a lot of thought and effort in it. He always gets so focused on things and gives 110%. Which, admittedly, can sometimes be a bad thing. He completely zones out sometimes when he's focused. Especially when he's watching tv. There is no talking to Zombie Russell when his attention is focused on the television.

But all of his great qualities make up for it. We've spent a lot of time with his Grandma and he is so good to her. He also is good with people, very intuitive, and gives a lot of valuable insights into his family's lives and the lives of other people around us. He is always encouraging me to think, and I appreciate that.

I guess there's a reason he calls himself Russell Smith the Magnificent.